Thursday, September 25, 2008

letter to a friend.

Rick is currently at his intramural football game, getting all that male energy out. (I can't count how many times I've been asked, "When can I tackle Carson??... ok, then, can I tackle you?") His team is made up of all med students, like himself, and they play teams from other Wake graduate schools. His team also happens to be made up of all single guys who spend a lot of time talking about girls and beer. Frequent topics of conversation include how "hot" that girl was who just walked by, and how many jell-os some guy ate last weekend without knowing it. (Ate? Drank? What IS a jell-0???) They all, of course, find it a little odd that Rick is their age and is also married with a baby.

One of his teammates commented to Rick recently that it must be awfully time-consuming to have a wife and a baby while in med school. Ohhhh, if I could have a conversation with this guy, what would I say... I probably will never get the chance, so here it goes.

Dear football dude who can't even remember what happened last weekend,

So you think being married is time-consuming. I imagine you may have dated girls who demanded a great deal of your time and attention. You may imagine that marriage is like dating those girls 24/7. Let me paint a picture of what your poor married friend Rick's life is like:

Richard does not do his own laundry. The clothes appear clean and folded in his drawers. He does not pay the bills. The electricity and water run without a glitch. He does not take the car in for repairs and sit in the waiting room for hours on end. He does not clean his own bathroom, although he is the primary cause of the need for cleaning. He doesn't vacuum, take out the trash, or clean the kitchen. It is magically spotless every night. Richard is served a hot breakfast. He is packed a hearty lunch. He is served a nutritious dinner. He never goes grocery shopping, but the fridge is always full. On occasion Rick's dinner is delivered to campus so he can continue studying without a pause.

In summary, I have basically devoted my life to 1.) taking care of my baby, and 2.) FREEING TIME for my husband to study. All I ask in return is a few minutes of daily cuddling and 10-20 minutes of listening to me blab. And occaisional help searching for lost items.

So, I ask, do you still think having a wife and baby must be awfully time-consuming??


Rick's wife/chef/maid/delivery girl/personal assistant/laundress

P.S. We can introduce you to some very nice girls if you are interested.


mackdick said...

clever post.

and, fyi, i jello shot is just jello made with vodka in little shot glasses.

Jessica said...

Awesome post. I just read it to the lady at work who also thought it was amusing. I hope you're enjoying it there in spite of it, or because of it. =)

Lindsi said...

favorite post. very enjoyable. also... when did your blog turn orange? Very enticing, I shall return often (like I don't anyway.)

Robyn said...

Well said!

JAMIE Probert COOK~ said...

I told Steve he had to read your post and behold our life in one year....I hope that your hubby realizes how lucky he is...You really are such a great example of how I want to be...thankyou!

Erika and Ryan said...

Yes, your hubby is one lucky guy! That's extremely nice and thoughtful of you to deliver him dinner at school!!

"C" said...

HAHA that is the funniest thing i have read in a long time. I think you should really give it to him.Your family is soo cute! Hope life is well!

Adam Wilson said...

Page, that was a hilarious post. One of your best ever, if I might indulge in saying so! Let me know if you have any girls for me on that short list... your description of married life doesn't sound half bad! ;)

Jamie said...

I could not have said it better myself. As the guys get further into med school, their classmates will become jealous of them because they begin to realize all of the time that is freed up by their wife/chef/personal assistant/laundress/etc.

Anonymous said...

You have offended me as a man. Thank you for ruining my dreams. Do you have a sister?